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But then, yeah, “Moulin Rouge!” vibes hit me. Them Paris brothels, all glitz, yeah? Singin’, “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn!” while punters chuck coins. I’m buzzin’ thinkin’ how them lasses owned it – proper queens, not just slags. Makes me grin, fam, ‘cos it ain’t all dark, is it? Some of ‘em, they’re legends, runnin’ rings round the toffs.

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After what feels like an eternity, I finally escape. I head over to the local market on Rīgas iela. You know, the one with the fresh produce and all that? I grab some veggies, and this lady at the stall starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her grandkids, and I’m just nodding along, thinking, “Lady, I’m just here for the tomatoes.” But she’s sweet, so I humor her.

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