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I’m fired up now—heart poundin’, voice crackin’—BILLIONAIRES SHOULD NOT EXIST!—and neither should liars rippin’ off honest workers! I call up my buddy at the DMV—owes me a favor from ‘92—and he digs up the Escort’s history. Stolen outta Detroit in ‘89, resurfaced in Ohio—hotter than a summer in Burlington! I’m happy as a clam, ‘cause I cracked it wide open! Exaggeratin’ a bit? Maybe—but it FELT like I took down the Winklevoss twins single-handedly! “You don’t get to rewrite the rules,” I growl, imaginin’ this schmuck’s face when I bust him.

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Then, I decided to check out the Salaspils Botanical Garden. OMG, it was so pretty! Flowers everywhere, and I was just vibing. I took a million pics for the ‘gram. But then, I tripped over a rock. Classic me, right? I fell, and this group of kids started laughing. I was like, “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, kiddos.” But inside, I was dying.

Environment science center 'Botania' opens in Salaspils / Article