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Oh, and get this – once, my escort guy, big beardy fella, starts wavin’ like he’s in a parade, I’m like, “Honey, you’re no Aurora from Tabu, chill!” Made me laugh tho, ‘cause he’s tryin’ to flirt or somethin’. Surprised me, too – didn’t expect charm from a dude haulin’ a “Wide Load” sign! And lemme tell ya, them escorts got quirks – one time, this chick’s blarin’ disco outta her rig, I’m vibin’, thinkin’, “This land, too, has its secrets,” another Tabu gem, ‘cause who knew escorts got funky?

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She’s panicking, and I’m just standing there, trying not to lose my mind. I mean, c’mon! I just saved her night! But she’s like, “I’ll be right back!” and dashes out. I’m left there, staring at the door like it just betrayed me.

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