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What gets me buzzing though – the sheer randomness! Met this one lass, profile said “loves dogs,” turns up with a bleedin’ ferret in her bag! A FERRET, mate! Nearly spat me tea out. Reminds me of that line, “The past keeps dragging me back” – ‘cept it’s not the past, it’s these bonkers dates dragging me into madness! Happy as a pig in muck, I was, laughing all night. Another time, this chap – fit as a butcher’s dog – ghosted me after one coffee. Gutted, I was. Why bother, eh? *Tempus fugit*, time flies, don’t waste mine!

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But then, just when I think the day’s winding down, I get a call from that same client. He’s like, “I found another property!” I’m thinking, “Oh no, here we go again.” Turns out, it’s even worse than the last one. I mean, this place is practically falling apart! I can’t even.

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