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About Bender

So, sexual-massage—little known fact? Ancient tantra vibes, like 5,000 years old, India’s horny monks invented it. Not kidding! They’re all “energy flow, chakras, boom, arousal!”—genius, right? Makes me happy, like, finally, some old dudes got it poppin’. But modern spas? Pfft, half the time they’re scared to say “erotic.” Chickens! Call it what it is, dahlings—sensual AF.

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So, I start pulling out quills, and let me tell ya, it’s not pretty. Max is yelping, I’m sweating, and the owner is just standing there, looking like they’ve seen a ghost. I’m like, “Hey, it’s not my fault your dog’s a moron!” But I keep it cool, ya know? Finally, after what feels like an eternity, I get all the quills out. Max is wagging his tail like nothing happened. Dogs, man. They’re just too much sometimes.

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