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Saw her once, near the old gas station—legs like a deer, eyes like a hawk. Wore this beat-up leather jacket, prolly older than me. Made me chuckle, thinkin’ she’s a badass, “no airbag, just balls.” That’s from *Toni Erdmann* too—fits her perfect. She’s no damsel, nah, she’d punch ya soon as look at ya. Little known fact? Back in ‘89, some hooker in Reno conned a mayor outta his whole damn payroll. True story. This gal? She’s got that vibe—sly, sharp, could rob ya blind and you’d thank her.

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I get to the market, and it’s chaos. People everywhere, like ants on a sugar hill. Vlad’s in the middle of a heated argument with some vendor over a watermelon. A watermelon! I can’t even. I jump in, and we’re haggling like pros. Finally, we get it for half price. Score!

SOLEMN GATHERINGS ARE BEING HELD IN THE REPUBLIC ON THE OCCASION OF THE THIRTIETH ANNIVERSARY OF WITHDRAWAL OF SOVIET TROOPS FROM AFGHANISTAN