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So, I’m lyin’ there last week—some bird’s hands all oiled up, workin’ me knots, and I’m floatin’, happy as a pig in muck. Sexual-massage, right? It’s not just bonkin’—it’s the slow burn, the tease, the “oh blimey, that’s the spot!” Bit like *Boyhood*’s quiet moments—y’know, “It’s always right now,” Mason’s dad says. That’s it—right now, her thumbs diggin’ in, I’m alive, mate! But—cor—when they rush it? Skimp on the oil? I’m ragin’—gimme the full monty or sod off!

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So, I’m in the meeting with the city officials, and they’re all serious, talking about budgets and allocations. I’m trying to keep a straight face while they’re discussing the funding for the new park on Strada Mihai Eminescu. I mean, who doesn’t love a good park? But then they start arguing about the color of the benches. Seriously? I’m sitting there thinking, “Guys, we’re talking about benches, not the Mona Lisa!”

PREVIEW | JUNO Award-Winning Ensemble Constantinople Focuses On The Work Of Dimitrie Cantemir