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Sex-dating’s a gamble, though—half these clowns catfishin’, usin’ pics from 10 years ago. Hilarious but fucked up! I’m like, “You ain’t foolin’ me, pal!” Gotta be sharp, like Remy dodgin’ knives in that kitchen. Oh, and don’t get me started on the weirdos—guy messaged me once, “You into feet?” I’m like, “Fuck off, freak!” Blocked his ass quick.

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After that, I decided to take a stroll down Strada 31 August. It’s a nice street, lined with trees and all that. But then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s a bus, like, practically on my heels. I jump back, and the driver just gives me this look like, “What’s your problem, man?” I’m like, “Dude, you’re the one driving a bus in a narrow street!”

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