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So I asks, “How much, precious?” She smirks, “Fifty quid, you weirdo.” Fifty! Robbery, that is! “I ain’t got no home,” I whines, quotin’ Llewyn again, hopin’ pity works. Nope. She rolls her eyes, walks off, hips swayin’. Grrr, made me ragey, but also – wow – them curves, my precious! Nearly chased her, but me legs, all wobbly, nah.

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Finally, I get it to work. Thank the meat gods! But then, just as I’m catchin’ my breath, this lady walks in. She’s all frantic, like she just ran a marathon. “I need a whole chicken! Like, now!” I’m like, “Lady, it’s not a drive-thru!” But I grab one, and she’s like, “Make it quick!” I’m sweating again.

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