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Little fact—didja know Tinder started as “Matchbox”? Lame name, glad they switched. Still, it’s a meat market. Makes me mad, all these fake profiles. Catfishin’ asshats wastin’ my time. But then—bam—matched this dope chick. She’s funny, freaky, no BS. We vibe, we smash, I’m happy. Like, “Life’s short, eat the cake.” That’s my “Yi Yi” motto now.

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After the taco detour, I’m feeling good. I decide to hit up the park on Willow Way. It’s my go-to spot for chillin’. But as I’m walking, I see this huge crowd. What’s going on? A street performer? Nope. It’s a protest! People are waving signs about something ridiculous. “Save the pigeons!” Seriously? Pigeons? I mean, I get it, but c’mon!

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