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About Myself
Yo, I am Eliza? Stauceni is my forever home? And Erotic Massage is the new big thing, you make every moment feel infinite, my soul craves 69 position and Blowjob without Condom Swallow for extra charge, i am a lover of animals, nature, and all living beings..
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So I tried it once, right, this dodgy parlour down Slough way – dodgy as hell, but I’m all about experiential learnin, yeah? Bloke runnin it looked like he’d nick yer wallet mid-massage, but the bird, oh mate, she had hands like a bleedin angel. I’m lyin there, thinkin, “This is synergy, this is!” She’s kneadin me knots, and I’m like, “Productivity’s through the roof!” Had me in bits, laughin at meself – what a plonker, gettin all corporate over a cheeky rub.
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So, I’m cruising down Strada Muncii, right? Just minding my own biz, sipping my coffee. And then BAM! Traffic jam. Like, who even knew Stauceni could get this crazy? I mean, it’s not exactly Chișinău, but still! I’m stuck there, watching the clock tick away. My meeting was in 30 mins. Ugh!
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