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Alright, listen up, fam—imagine me, Morgan Freeman, deep voice rollin’ like thunder, sittin’ you down to talk sex-dating. Yeah, that wild world of swipin’, hookin’ up, and prayin’ you don’t catch feels—or worse. I’m an agronomist, sure, I know dirt, crops, seasons, but sex-dating? That’s a whole ‘nother soil to till, and I got thoughts, y’all. Picture this—me, leanin’ back, wise as hell, narratin’ this mess like it’s a Kim Ki-duk flick, my fave, *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring*. That movie’s got layers, cycles, lust, and lessons—perfect for this convo.

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Finally, I get my act together. I’m back in the game, and I nail the final banderilla. The crowd erupts! I’m on cloud nine. But then, I see my phone buzzin’. It’s my mom. She’s like, “Did you win?” I’m like, “Mom, it’s not a game!” But I love her for checkin’ in.

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