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Favorite part? When they hit that spot—ooh, like findin’ the Pearl after years lost! Ye melt, ye groan, ye forget Blackbeard’s curses. But here’s the rub, mate: some call it sinful, others call it healin’. Me? I say it’s a pirate’s delight—keeps the scurvy at bay! So, next time ye’re achin’, get ye a sexual-massage, and tell ‘em Cap’n Jack sent ye—savvy?

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After that, I strolled down to the park by the river. The Dniester River, to be exact. It’s beautiful, man. I sat on a bench, strumming my guitar, just vibing. Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up to me. He’s like, “Play ‘Despacito’!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a jukebox!” But I played it anyway. The kid starts dancing, and suddenly, I’m the coolest dude in Stefan-Voda. Crazy how fast that can change, right?

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