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Oh, and the oils—don’t get me started! They’re warm, they’re silky, sometimes they smell like sex in a bottle—oops, did I say that? Hahaha! *snort* I love it, but once I got this cheapo massage—oil was like motor grease, ugh! Made me wanna scream, “This ain’t erotic, it’s a car tune-up!” Total buzzkill. But when it’s good? Oh, doll, it’s like lyin’ in “fields of green,” movie-style—ya feel alive, tingly, maybe a lil’ naughty. *wink*

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First off, I hit up the local café on the corner of Hithadhoo Magu. You know, the one with the best mas huni? I’m sittin’ there, chowing down, when this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder! Like, what? Who brings a parrot to breakfast? I’m just tryna enjoy my tuna and flatbread, and here’s this guy, all “Polly wants a cracker!” I almost spit out my coffee.

Eydhafushi begins collecting info of unaccompanied children out at night