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She weren’t no cliché, tho – no fishnets or fake lashes. Wore this ratty jumper, looked knackered. Little fact fer ya: some o’ ‘em, back in old London, paid taxes! Bloody taxman didn’t care where coin came from – “We all gotta eat!” Made me chuckle, thinkin’ o’ me, hunched over ledgers, while she’s dodgin’ coppers. Stupid, fat hobbit! Missin’ the real story. She told me once – yeah, I chatted her up, curious git – said she’d been a nurse! Lost her job, NHS cuts, boom, pavement life. Gutted me, that did. “What’s your core competency?” – I’d ask, like Toni’s dad, takin’ the piss.

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After that, I hit up the market on the main street. It’s packed, like always. I’m dodging people, trying to grab some fresh fruit. I spot these mangos, and I’m like, “Yesss!” But then, this lady cuts in front of me. I’m like, “Really? You gotta be kidding me!” I mean, come on, it’s just a mango!

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