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Alright, so erotic-massage, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—what’s the deal with it? Ya got hands rubbin’ all over, oiled up, slippery as hell, and I’m like, “Pretty, pretty good!” But then—bam!—it hits me, it’s not just some backrub at the chiropractor’s, no sir! This is sensual, steamy, *erotic*—like somethin’ outta “Requiem for a Dream,” ya know? That movie’s my jam—gritty, messy, everybody’s chasin’ somethin’. Like Harry and Marion, all tangled up, desperate, bodies crashin’—erotic-massage kinda feels like that, but less heroin, more coconut oil.

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But then, outta nowhere, I hear a scream. My heart drops. I turn, and it’s a lady from the crowd. She’s pointing at the water. “There! There!” I rush over, and what do I see? A body. Yeah, a freakin’ body.

Ungoofaaru police station destroys seized alcohol bottles