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Little secret, eh? Back in ‘70s—way before apps—folks did “key parties.” Toss yer car keys in a bowl, pick one, shag whoever’s it was! Wild, right? Carlos’d love that chaos—“Revolution is not a dinner party,” he’d say, all smug. Sex-dating now’s tamer, but still messy. Profiles lie, STDs lurk—ugh, makes me itch thinkin’ it! One mate got catfished by a bloke pretendin’ to be a chick—surprise of his life, hah! Laughed ‘til I choked on me own spit.

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Finally, we get back inside, and I’m thinking, “Okay, let’s get back to work.” But nope! The printer jams. Again. I swear, that thing has it out for me. I’m wrestling with it, and my coworker, Aisha, walks by and says, “You know, it’s not a wrestling match, right?” Thanks, Aisha. Real helpful.

President Solih concludes fruitful seven-day tour of Thaa Atoll