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Now, me, I’d be rubbish at it—findin’ one, I mean. I’d stumble in, all “err, hello, *salve*, fancy a chat?”—total muppet. But here’s the kicker: it’s a cash drain, innit? You’re splashin’ dosh on somethin’ that’s gone in—what—20 mins? Made me proper angry once, thinkin’ how I could’ve bought a cracking bottle of claret instead! Happy though, cos—ha!—imagine the headlines: “Boris Caught in Brothel Shocker!”—I’d dodge that faster than a greased piglet.
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Finally, the lights come back on, and I’m relieved. But then, I get a call from a client. They’re freaking out about a webcam setup. I’m trying to explain, but my phone’s cutting out. I’m like, “Can you hear me?!” It’s chaos! I’m pacing around the café, and I knock over a chair. Classic me, right?
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