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What gets me hyped? The hustle, yo! Some of these folks are straight-up artists—charmin’, witty, flippin’ the script on lonely suckers. But the stigma? Trash. Society’s all “eww, gross,” and I’m like, “Shut up, Karen, you’re just jealous!” Surprised me how many escorts got degrees—psychology, business—like, they’re outsmartin’ us all! One time, I read ‘bout this escort who paid off her student loans in a YEAR. A YEAR! I’m still cryin’ over my ramen budget!

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But then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming, right? Apparently, her dog just chased a squirrel down the Markt. I’m thinkin’, “Lady, it’s a dog. Chill.” But she’s all like, “My precious Fido could’ve been hurt!” I mean, come on! It’s a squirrel!

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