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I reckon it’s a trip—mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!”—seein’ these birds strut about, all glam, hidin’ the grind. Met this one lass, right, swore she escorted a rockstar once. Said he tipped her with a bleedin’ guitar pick! Mad as a bag of ferrets, that. Got me chuffed, though—imagine the stories! But then, there’s the dark bit—pisses me off somethin’ fierce. Some punters treat ‘em like dirt, thinkin’ cash buys soul. “The stone sinks in the lake,” like the movie says—ya can’t escape the weight, can ya?

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First off, I roll into Axel, and it’s like, whoa! This place is buzzing. I mean, I’m used to the quiet of the forest, not the hustle of the city. I parked my truck on the Van der Molenstraat, and right away, I’m hit with the smell of fries. Like, seriously? I just got here, and I’m already tempted to ditch my healthy forest diet.

What is a quad axel? Explaining Ilia Malinin's famed figure skating jump