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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, straight up, no fancy nonsense. Picture this, ok? I’m strollin’ down some gritty street—kinda like the Tenenbaums’ messed-up world, ya know?—and I’m thinkin’, “Royal’d probably hire a hooker just to spite Margot!” Ha! That’s the vibe. Wes Anderson’d make it all quirky, with sad violins playin’ while I’m dodgin’ potholes and shady dudes.

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I get to the market, and it’s packed. Like, people everywhere. I’m dodging strollers and old folks. I spot this fruit stand, and the guy’s selling strawberries for a euro. A euro! I’m like, “Bro, are these magic strawberries or what?” He just laughs. I buy a bunch, feeling like a boss.

At least 31 victims in Barendrecht child sex abuse case, many from same families