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Ooh, I’s surprised last week—my neighbor, Miss Pearl, said she got one from this big ol’ hairy dude named Bubba. Bubba! I laughed ‘til I cried, picturin’ his paws kneadin’ her like dough. “Everything’s burning,” like the movie says—well, her cheeks sure was!
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First off, I hit up the local café on Hoofdstraat. Best coffee in town, no joke. I ordered my usual—double espresso, extra shot. The barista, a dude named Joris, was all smiles. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my croissant! Like, seriously? I’m just tryin’ to enjoy my breakfast, and this feathered thief decides to make me his breakfast. I was fumin’! I yelled, “Hey! Get your own food, ya punk!” But the bird just looked at me like, “What’s your problem, human?” Ugh, so annoying.
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