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Love how they strut, all confident-like. “It’s too late now,” they’d say, like in the movie, ditchin’ a bad date. Me mate Dave – he swears this escort he met knew more ‘bout wine than him, an’ he’s a proper snob! Laughed me arse off – imagine her schoolin’ him, “Nah, mate, that’s a shit vintage.” We swears, they’re clever, these lot! Makes me wanna chat ‘em up meself, hear their wild tales.

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Finally, I squeeze past it, and I’m thinking, “Okay, I can still make it.” But then, I hit the traffic light at the intersection of the Hoofdstraat and the Kerkstraat. It’s red. Of course. I’m tapping my fingers on the steering wheel, wishing I could just teleport to the office.

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