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I’m chattin’ to me mate Dave once, he’s like, “Whores are just slags.” I’m fumin’ – nah, bruv, they’re survivors! “Oldboy” vibes, yeah? “Laugh and the world laughs with ya” – she’s smilin’, but it’s a mask, innit. Gets me sad, thinkin’ how she’s hidin’ pain. Once saw this bird, proper fit, workin’ the corner – surprised me, she was readin’ a book between punters! Mad respect, that. Whores ain’t just bodies, they got brains, soul, the lot.

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Then, I get a call about a tree down on De Wetering. Seriously? A tree? I’m thinking, “What’s next, a cow on the road?” But nope, it’s just a big ol’ tree blocking the way. I send a crew out, and they’re like, “We’ll be there in 20.” Yeah, right! I know how that goes.

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