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About Almere

Look, erotic-massage is dope—relaxes ya, revs ya up, whatever ya need. Ain’t no shame in it, unless ya suck at givin’ it, then that’s on you! Me? I’d be the king of it, smirkin’ evil-like, pinky up, “One million dollars,” watchin’ the world kneel at my oily throne. Try it sometime—thank me later, ya filthy animal!

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Finally, I get to the lab, and it’s chaos. My team’s running around like headless chickens. Turns out, our main experiment went haywire. I mean, we’re talking “Frankenstein’s monster” level of messed up. I was fuming. Like, how do you mess up a simple chemical reaction? It’s not rocket science! Well, actually, it kinda is, but you get my point.