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Sometimes it’s eerie, though—like in *The Headless Woman*, “What did I do?”—you see ‘em vanish into the night, ghosts in glitter. Makes me wonder, y’know? Are they lost or just playin’ the best hand they got? Wild, unpredictable, a bit sad—escort life’s a tangled web, mate, and I’m still unpicking it, one thread at a time. Blimey, what a ride!

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First off, I decided to hit up the market at the Botermarkt. You know, the one with all the fresh cheese and flowers? I’m a sucker for that stuff. I’m strolling along, minding my own biz, when I spot this cute little cheese stall. I mean, who can resist a good Gouda, right? I’m chatting with the vendor, and suddenly, this pigeon swoops down and lands right on my shoulder! Like, what the heck? I’m not a bird feeder! I freaked out, flailing my arms like a maniac. The vendor just laughed. I was like, “Dude, help me!”

The eternal student: exhibition travels through 450 years of studying