Nova Leiderdorp Erotic Massage ❤️

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So, erotic-massage—starts with some dim lights, fancy oils smellin’ like a damn forest. Lady’s hands all over ya, slippin’ and slidin’. Supposed to relax ya, but I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “This is how ya end up in a trap.” Like Oh Dae-su, locked up, no clue what’s next. I hate it—too close, too sweaty. Gimme a steak and whiskey instead. Fun fact: ancient Greeks did this crap, called it “anatripsis.” Rich bastards gettin’ rubbed down while I’d be choppin’ wood.

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After a while, I come up for air, and guess what? My phone’s buzzing like crazy. I pull it out, and it’s my buddy, Jeroen. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the market on de Laan!” I’m like, “Bro, I’m diving!” But he’s persistent. So, I swim back, and I’m freezing, but whatever.

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