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I tried it once—swear to God, felt like my spine was singin’. Made me happy as hell, like I’d just dodged a bullet in a shootout. But here’s what pissed me off: some folks out here chargin’ $200 for a half-assed rubdown—c’mon, man, “knock it down, knock it down!” like Buscapé yellin’ at the madness. Ain’t nobody got time for that rip-off. A good sexual-massage? It’s gotta flow, gotta hit deep—muscles loosenin’, mind spinnin’, maybe even a lil naughty twist if you’re feelin’ bold. Wink wink, you know what I mean.

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Bij Krysia in Marum, Raadhuisstraat 7, CB - Telefoonnummer, informatie en kaart van Bij Krysia - Rubriek Massage.

After that, I decide to grab lunch at this little café on De Wierde. I order a sandwich, and it takes forever. I’m sitting there, scrolling through my phone, and I see a meme about how slow service is. I’m like, “Wow, this is too real.” Finally, my food comes, and it’s amazing! Like, I could marry this sandwich.

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