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But here’s the kicker – it ain’t just bout the naughty bits. Naw, it’s them long strokes, the way they dig into yer knots an’ make ya feel human again. Had this one fella – swear he was a wizard – found a spot in my back I didn’t even know was screamin’. I was happier than a pig in mud! How’s that workin’ for ya, Dr. Phil? Shoot, better than a cold beer on a hot day, I’ll tell ya!

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Back to the grind. The calls keep coming. One guy from the Veldstraat is complaining about the potholes. “It’s like driving in a war zone!” he says. I’m like, “Dude, it’s Teteringen, not Baghdad!” But I get it. Those potholes are no joke. I swear, I almost lost a wheel last week on the way to the Albert Heijn.

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