Hannah Tubbergen Erotic Massage ❤️

About Almere

*Caché* got me paranoid, tho. “Who sent this tape?” I’m imaginin’ some masseuse filmin’ me snorin’ on the table. Absurd, right? Prolly just my brain fuckin’ with me. Oh, and the oils—lavender, eucalyptus, whatever—smells like a forest orgy. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d pay extra for that neck crack. Shit’s gold. Worst part? When they ghost your feet. Like, bro, massage ‘em, don’t tease me! Hannibal out here judgin’—erotic-massage is 8/10, but don’t skip the toes, fam. Peace.

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So, I finally make it home, and I’m exhausted. I flop on the couch, and my phone buzzes again. It’s my friend, asking if I wanna go out. I’m like, “Are you kidding? I just survived a war zone at work!” But then I think, “Maybe I need to unwind.” So, I say yes.

GVSU’s Jake Van Tubbergen is preseason All-American