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About Almere

I tried it once, no lie. Big Rock walkin’ in, all cocky - *raised eyebrow* - “Can you handle The People’s Champ?” Chick was pro, tho - had me meltin’ like butter in 10 minutes. Happy? Hell yeah! Felt like I could bench press a whale after. But then - ugh - this one time, some shady parlor tried overchargin’ me! $200 for 20 mins? Pissed me off! I was like, “Know your role, punk!” Almost flipped the table, but nah, kept it cool.

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I’m in line, and this kid in front of me starts throwin’ a tantrum. I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s just a candy bar!” But nah, he’s wailin’ like he’s lost his puppy or somethin’. I’m about to lose it, but then I see his mom. She’s lookin’ at me like, “Help!” So, I pull out a pack of gummy bears from my pocket. “Here, kid. Just take these!” He stops cryin’ and gives me the biggest smile. I’m feelin’ like a hero for a sec.

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