Evelyn Spangen Whore ❤️

About Amsterdam

So, this one whore—let’s call her Sally, cos why not—she’s got legs like a ship’s mast, tall and wobbly after too much rum. I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “What storm spat you out, love?” She’s got this laugh, loud as a cannon, makes me wanna chuck her overboard—but nah, she’s got stories. Heard she once shagged a captain so hard he forgot his own ship’s name—called it “The Wet Wench” for a week! Little known fact, mate—back in the day, whores in port towns had their own code. Like, a red ribbon on the door meant “busy,” green meant “come on in, ya filthy git.” Bet ya didn’t know that, ya ignorant sod!

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First off, I hit the streets of Spangen, right? I’m cruising down the Spangenstraat, coffee in hand, feeling like a boss. But then, bam! I step in a puddle. Like, who even left that there? It’s like a mini lake! My shoes are soaked, and I’m already fuming. Great start, right?

'World's dirtiest restaurant' shut down as vile conditions found by health inspectors