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I’d be all nervous, tho—heart poundin’ like when Miss Piggy’s mad at me! “Hi-ho, don’t karate-chop me!” I’d say. Prolly fumble my words, askin’ her, “So, uh, how’s biz?” She’d prolly laugh, like, “Kid, you’re too green for this!” And I’d be happy—cuz, ya know, I love a good chuckle. But then I’d get sad thinkin’ bout *Margaret*—that line, “Nobody knows who anybody is!” Hits deep, man. These gals, they got stories nobody hears.

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I walk in, and it’s packed. Like, who knew Bryne had this many coffee addicts? I order my usual—black coffee, no sugar, keep it real. But the barista? She spills it all over the counter. I’m standing there, just staring, like, “Really? Is this how we’re starting the day?”

Obituary: Brock Patrick O’Bryne