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So yeah, findin’ a prostitute ain’t just a quick shag hunt. It’s a bloody adventure, mate – quirky, messy, like Amélie’s Paris. “The world is not so bad,” she’d whisper, and I reckon Ruby’d agree, puffin’ her fag. Next time I’m on the water, I’ll be scoutin’ – not just for drownin’ fools, but for them unsung heroes of the night. Blimey, what a lark!

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Then, I decided to stroll down to the pedestrian street, Storgata. It’s like the main artery of the city, full of shops and cafes. I’m walking, minding my own business, when I see this street performer. Dude was playing the accordion like he was in a movie or something. I was vibing, feeling all happy and stuff. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and poops right next to me! Like, really? I’m just trying to enjoy the music, and the universe sends me a gift from above. Thanks, nature.

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