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I’d get mad tho—grrr—cuz some jerks’d prolly scam me! Like, “Gimme 20 bucks, Pat!” and then—poof—no girl! I’d be screamin’, “That’s not fair!” stompin’ my flippers. But then—happy vibes! Say I find one, she’s all chill, smokin’ a cig, leanin’ on a wall. I’d go, “Are you my Charlotte?” ya know, from the movie—cuz I’m deep like that! She’d prolly laugh, “Kid, you’re nuts!” and I’d be all proud, blushin’ pinker than my skin!

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Finally, I make it to the arena. The crowd’s hyped, and I’m feeling the adrenaline. But then, the bull shows up. And let me tell you, this dude was massive. Like, “I skipped leg day for a year” massive. I’m standing there, heart racing, thinking, “What did I get myself into?”

Rumbling meteor lights up Norway; part of it may have landed near Oslo