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But then—ugh—there’s the flip side. Some jerks treat ‘em like trash, and that pisses me off! Like, c’mon, they’re humans, not props! Reminds me of that creep Wiesler in the movie, spyin’ and judgin’. “The lives of others are never as glamorous as they seem,” he’d prolly say. And escorts? They see it all—rich dudes cryin’, fake laughs, the works. Bet they’ve got stories that’d make Miss Piggy blush!

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I wake up in my little flat on Storgata, right? The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be epic!” Spoiler alert: it was anything but.

Norwegians set world record for longest gingerbread train – again!