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What pisses me off? The hypocrites. Politicians bangin’ escorts, then preachin’ family values—gimme a break. Everybody lies, man, specially those suits. But what gets me happy? When an escort outsmarts ‘em—flips the game, walks away loaded. Like, hell yeah, you go! Surprised me once, too—this chick I knew, signed to me how she’d stash cash in her bra, tax-free, livin’ better than me. Ballsy as fuck.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Strandgata. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual, a flat white, and the barista, bless her heart, spills half of it. I’m like, “Great start, dude.” But she’s super apologetic, gives me a free pastry. Score! I’m munching on this cinnamon roll, and it’s like a hug in my mouth.

Fig. 2. Bedrock geology of the Kejser Franz Josef Fjord region (based...