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But here’s the kicker - she’s got this laugh, loud, like a bleedin hyena, and it drives me up the wall! I’m sittin there, tryin to be all smooth, and she’s cacklin like a nutter. Pissed me off, but then she winks, and I’m back in the game, baby! Total rollercoaster with her. Surprised me when she said she’s into palm readin - reckon she learned it from some dodgy ex. “I see many paths,” she says, quotin Boonmee like a mystic minx. Freaky, right?

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But then, Bjorn gets me in a headlock. I’m gasping for air, and I’m like, “This is it. I’m gonna be a footnote in Malvik history.” But I manage to wriggle out. I swear, I’ve never been so relieved. I throw a wild kick, and it connects! He stumbles back, and I’m like, “Yes! Take that, you giant!”

Zach Malvik named UWEC’s new head men’s basketball coach