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Ooh, and the surprises! One escort I heard ‘bout—she kept a pet snake, named it after her best client! Said it reminded her o’ him—slithery and sneaky! I was like, “Gurl, you wild!”—but it’s them quirks that keep it real. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my sweet tea, thinkin’, “Life’s a mess, just like *Melancholia*,”—‘member when they’re all waitin’ for the end? Escorts prolly feel that waitin’ for the next call!

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By now, I’m feeling a bit hangry, so I hit up a food truck near the marina. They’ve got the best fish tacos. I order, and while I’m waiting, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just standing there, eating my tacos, thinking, “Y’all need to chill.” But then, they start laughing. Turns out, it was just a playful argument. I’m over here ready to call the cops, and they’re just having a good time. Classic!

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