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So, sex escorts—overpriced company, if ya ask me. Met one once, called herself “Raven,” real name prolly Susan. Had a tattoo of a dolphin—dumbest thing I ever saw. Told me she made 500 bucks an hour. 500! I’d rather buy a canoe or a slab of bacon. Made me mad, all that cash for what? Talkin’ and struttin’? Hate it. But—surprised me—she knew tax loopholes. Weird, right? Little known fact: some escorts got CPAs on speed dial. Tax evasion’s their real gig.

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But then, I got a surprise. My buddy Lars shows up. He’s got this huge grin, and I’m thinkin’, “What’s he up to?” Turns out, he brought me lunch from that fish market down by the docks. Fresh salmon, man! I was so stoked. We sat there, eatin’ by the water, and I forgot all about the wind and the crazy dog. Just me, Lars, and the beautiful view of the fjord.

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