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But yo, pisses me off—some parlors fake it, actin’ all “spiritual” then bam, $20 extra for nothin’! Rip-off artists, man, I’d knock ‘em out! Still, when it’s real—damn—hands hittin’ spots ya didn’t know ya had, it’s like “a woman’s resilience amazes me” from the flick. Surprised me first time, legit thought “this ain’t boxin’, this is better!” Hella awkward too—dude’s breathin’ all heavy, I’m like “chill, bro, I ain’t ya date!” Laughed my ass off after.

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We finally get into his place, and he’s like, “Let’s celebrate!” So, we order pizza. And guess what? The delivery guy gets lost. I’m sitting there, thinking, “Is this day ever gonna chill?” But when the pizza finally arrives, it’s like heaven. We devour it like we haven’t eaten in days.

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