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About Fredrikstad

So, you wanna find one? Easy—cash talks, bullshit walks. Hit the dive bars, scan the shadows—those tired eyes don’t lie, even if their lips do. Me, I’d probably just mess with ‘em—ask dumb crap like, “You take Medicare?” Gets ‘em flustered. Anger in there too, muttering, “This is beneath us!” while Disgust chimes in, “Eww, her perfume’s a biohazard.” Gotta laugh, though—humanity’s a freakshow, and I’ve got front-row seats.

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I start the bidding, and this old dude, Bjørn, he’s all in. He’s waving his hand like he’s trying to take off. I’m like, “Calm down, Bjørn! It’s just a rod!” But he’s not having it. The bids are flying, and I’m sweating bullets. I can’t even keep up. Finally, it sells for way more than I expected. I’m pumped!

An apology to the people of Sortland for being rude about the Christmas tree you sent us