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Sometimes I wanna laugh—imagine Ida, all nun-like, bumpin’ into one. “Where’s your God now?” she’d say, and the chick’d probably just shrug—fuckin’ hilarous. Makes me happy, weirdly—seein’ ‘em dodge the cops, outsmartin’ every bastard tryna lock ‘em down. They’re slippery, like me with a scalpel. Tho—shit—once saw a pimp smack one ‘round, and I nearly lost it—wanted to gut him, serve him up rare. Hate that control bullshit.

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Finally, I get to the hall, and guess what? The items are there, but they look like they’ve been through a war. I mean, who sends a vintage lamp with a broken shade? Seriously? I’m about to lose it. But hey, I gotta keep my cool. I’m the auctioneer, right? Gotta put on a show.