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About Oslo

Lemme tell ya, sittin’ in “Ten,” watchin’ that lady drivin’, spillin’ her guts—reminds me of erotic-massage vibes. “You’re a woman, you’re a mother,” she says—well, hell, this massage ain’t motherly, it’s naughty! Hands roamin’ where they shouldn’t, kneadin’ knots outta yer soul. Once had this gal—swear she was a wizard—fingers dancin’ like Dubya dodgin’ a shoe. Felt like I’d died and gone to Crawford, y’all. Surprised me how it’s legal—well, sorta, depends on the joint.

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After that, I needed a break. So, I grab a coffee at Kaffa, my go-to spot. Best coffee in Tønsberg, hands down. I’m sitting there, trying to chill, when I overhear this couple arguing. They’re going off about something ridiculous—like who left the milk out. I’m thinking, “Get a grip, people! It’s just milk!” But then again, I’ve had my fair share of milk-related drama.

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