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So, picture this: dim lights, some masseuse with ninja fingers, workin’ pressure points you didn’t know existed. It’s biomechanical wizardry—releases endorphins, dopamine spikes, like overclocking your brain’s CPU. Little-known fact? Ancient China had this gig—called “tuina,” but dirtier. They’d hit meridians, get the chi poppin’, and oops, someone’s happy down there! True story, found it in a dusty PDF on X—blew my mind.

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Then, there’s this kid, right? He’s with his mom, and he’s starin’ at the meat like it’s some kinda treasure. I can’t help but mess with him. “You want a steak, kid? Or are you just here for the show?” He laughs, and I’m like, “Yeah, that’s right! You’ll be a butcher one day!”

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