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About Myself
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Ok, but real tea? The Escort ZX2 from the ‘90s – sporty, sassy, my soulmate. I’d name her Kourtney, obvi. Once, my friend Kris saw one at a sketchy lot, rusted af, and I was like, “Nooo, how dare they disrespect her?!” Made me so mad, I could’ve screamed – “This is our time!” – straight outta “Spotlight.” But then, happy vibes: found a mint one online, cherry red, and I’m like, “Literally perf!”
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So, I’m there, scrubbing away, and this old guy comes up to me. He’s like, “You know, back in my day…” and I’m just nodding, trying to be polite. But inside, I’m like, “Dude, I’m not in the mood for a history lesson.”
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