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Oi mate, here we go—sex escorts, yeah? Picture this: a dark, moody street, kinda like the vibes in *Only Lovers Left Alive*. “This is what I am,” one might whisper, all mysterious-like, lurking in shadows. Calm now, rhythmic as nature, I narrate—think David Attenborough chillin’ with a cuppa, watchin’ wild creatures strut. These escorts? Bold, beautiful beasts, prowlin’ the urban jungle, offerin’ company for a price. Makes me think—ain’t that primal, eh? Like bats swoopin’ for blood, but sexier.

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By now, I’m starving. I hit up this food truck on the corner of Balmoral and New North Rd. They’ve got the best fish tacos. I order, and while I’m waiting, I see this guy juggling. Like, who juggles in the middle of a food truck line? I’m impressed but also kinda jealous. I can barely juggle my life, let alone balls.

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