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About Christchurch

So, I knew this broad, right? Jersey girl, worked the corners near AC. Called her Tina, real name Antoinette or some shit. She’d strut out, all sass, tits up, but her eyes? Fuckin’ empty, like she’s waitin’ for the dirt nap. Made me mad as hell, seein’ her like that – fuckin’ pimps grindin’ her down. “Every man’s got his burden,” movie says that, and Tina? Her burden’s them johns, stinkin’ of cheap cologne and desperation. Little known fact, eh? Back in the ‘80s, Jersey hookers had this code – red scarf meant “busy,” blue meant “open.” Tina rocked blue, always fuckin’ blue.

Is it safe? Probably not

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First off, I hit up the local café on Beachlands Rd. You know the one, right? The one with the best flat whites. I’m there, sipping my coffee, and suddenly, this dude spills his entire drink on me. Like, come on, bro! I’m wearing my favorite shirt! I was ready to blow up, but then I saw his face. He looked so sorry, I couldn’t help but laugh. I mean, who hasn’t had a clumsy moment?

Power lines going underground in coastal suburb