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Me, I’d swipe right for chaos—someone wild, unpredictable. Probs why I dig *Tree of Life*—it’s all about life’s mess, love, pain, fuckin’ up. Sex-dating’s the same! You roll the dice, maybe get laid, maybe get a stalker—ooh, thrill! Once knew this lass—met her on OkCupid, she was into weird kinks, like blindfold stuff. Surprised me, honestly—thought I’d seen it all. Turned out she was a historian, told me sex-dating’s roots go back to Roman orgies. Casual hookups, toga-style—fuckin’ lit, right? History’s hornier than ya think.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Botany Road. You know, the one with the best flat whites? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual, and the barista, bless her, totally messed it up. I mean, how do you mess up a flat white? It’s like, come on! I was ready to throw a fit, but then she gave me a free muffin. So, I guess that’s a win?

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