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About New Plymouth

But—hah!—sometimes it’s gold. Mate of mine, hairy git, met his wife on OkCupid. Proper shock, that! “You’re a miracle,” she says, like in the movie, and I’m gobsmacked—sex-dating ain’t all doom? Rare, tho. Most times, it’s STD scares or weirdos textin’ dick pics at 3 a.m. Had a laugh once—bloke bragged he shagged 50 birds off Plenty of Fish. Liar! Smelled fishier than his story, precious.

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First off, I hit the road on Macleans Rd. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I was ready to crush my to-do list. But then, bam! Traffic jam on the way to the office. Like, seriously? It’s a Tuesday, not a Friday! I was stuck behind some dude in a rusty old car. I swear it was belching smoke like a dragon. I was fuming.

21B Wells Road, Bucklands Beach, Manukau City